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Difference Between an RM and a Cannibal

What is the difference between a returned missionary and a cannibal?

Returned Missionary:  Tired of eating baked beans.
Cannibal:  Tired of eating baked beings.

Returned Missionary:  Gives thanks for his daily bread.
Cannibal:  Gives thanks for his daily dead.

Returned Missionary:  Actively looking for an eligible young lady.
Cannibal:  Actively looking for an edible young lady.

Returned Missionary:  Has learned to follow his leaders.
Cannibal:  Has learned to swallow his leaders.

Returned Missionary:  Thinks his future wife should make a delicious dinner.
Cannibal:  Also thinks his future wife should make a delicious dinner.

Returned Missionary:  Serves his fellow man.
Cannibal:  Serves his fellow man with gravy.

- A Mormon Zone Original (with some punch-lines borrowed from old cannibal jokes)

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